When love hurts

Makayla on her "Dora the Explorer" flip-out sofa. She loves this sofa, which she sits on while she watches the Wiggles and "reads" her books.

Makayla and her blocks.

Makayla riding the little fire truck at the mall.


Love is a wonderful thing: it is the most powerful force in this world and we have never fully lived until we have loved. One of the most intense (if not THE most intense) form of love is maternal love. Often, that love comes with overwhelming joy and pride in my little girl. One smile, one giggle from her melts any anger I feel toward the world. Other times, looking at her pictures makes me cry. I really can't put a finger on what exactly makes me cry at those moments. I think it's a combination of things: I feel so guilty missing so much of her every day life because I'm at work; I feel as though I haven't given her enough of myself whenever I do spend time with her; I just want her to have the best of everything and fear that I won't be able to do that. I love this child so much, I don't want to fail her in any way. And the thought that I might do that, because of some decision I have made or have yet to make, makes me cry. It hurts to think of her getting less than the best of everything, including myself, yet I know I can only do my best to be the best mother to my beloved child. Love is a wonderful thing, but sometimes it's so intense, it hurts.